Here begins a mini-rant…
But it drives me batty when I hear people judging other people’s weddings.
“It drives me crazy when brides do (insert plethora of offenses here).” “Ohmygod, I can’t believe she served that at her reception!.” “Wow, who dressed that groom, what a slob!”
Pardon me, but who cares?
Yes, I realize I’m judging those that judge, but it just rubs me the wrong way when I hear people complain about weddings that are not their own.
And maybe this stems from my recognition that I am, by most people’s accounts, planning a wedding that will be (wait for it!) tacky.
Ariel at OffBeatBride already wrote the post on tacky, but I like to read it from time to time, just to remind me. (I also like need to reread this one often, and it’s also my mantra: my wedding is not a contest).
Dustin’s going to wear a suit instead of a tux, and we’re getting married outside just a few days before Thanksgiving. Tacky! Inappropriate! And I don’t give a donkey’s behind. Because it’s what we want. It’s what we’ll enjoy.
My mom is handling our wedding cake, and it’s going to be a total surprise to both of us, and she’s already said it’s not going to be a traditional wedding cake. And I can’t wait! Because yeah, I’m pretty sure there’s going to be a book on it somewhere, and it’s definitely going to turn out more like a groom’s cake than a wedding cake, but again, I can’t wait! It’s going to be fun. I love letting my mom surprise us like this, and I know she enjoys it, too.
We’re not having a reception. Instead, we’re eating dinner at a not-so-fancy restaurant, and other people will be eating their dinner right there beside us (probably wondering who’s thrown such a tacky wedding), and I’m in all probability going to get wasted on margaritas, but that’s half the fun. FOR US.
I realize that most people don’t want the kind of wedding we’re planning. And that’s wonderful! Go have your own wedding, that’s exactly what you want. Don’t do the things I’m doing! Or, steal all of my ideas, which I stole from someone else!
I’ve already been judged when I’ve told people about our wedding. It will happen in the future, and I’m sure people are sitting back now, shaking their heads in disapproval. Well, shake till your neck snaps off, ’cause I’m having the time of my life. We’re planning a wedding that feels right to us. We’re planning a wedding that we and our families can enjoy. We’re planning a wedding that will make us smile. And everyone should be so lucky.
Edited to say: I need this lesson as much as anyone else. I’m really, really good at judging people (not just weddings), and I shouldn’t be this way. Let’s work on it together.