Heels Not Made for Walking

I bought shoes yesterday.

I know, I know. But these are special shoes. These are red shoes. Patent leather shoes. Shoes with 4 inch heels I will NEVER learn to walk in. These are the shoes I’ll be wearing for my boudoir session.

Dustin didn’t think he liked a heel higher than 2 inches or so (good for me, because I can barely walk in flats). That is, of course, until I tried on a pair of stilettos in Target one afternoon. He liked them after that.

Hello, sexy.

Funny story. I’m in Shoe Carnival, taking up an entire row of chairs. I’ve got no fewer than 5 or 6 boxes of high heels surrounding me. I’ve got my jeans pulled up to my knees, my cell phone is out, and I’m taking a picture of every shoe I try on from at least 3 different angles in the mirror. I’m (trying my hand at) walking, I’m posing, I’m kicking my heels up to my butt. I need to see what these shoes look like from EVERY POSSIBLE ANGLE.

At first, people just think I’m a rude customer. Then people start thinking I’m weird. I’m getting funny looks. I’m getting raised eyebrows. I think a little old lady though I was a stripper. Until finally, a middle aged woman stops me, and says, pointing to the shoe on my right foot (because there was a different one on my left foot), “That one’s a sexy shoe.” I laughed appreciatively, and told here what I was really doing trying on 8 pairs of stripper heels.

“Oh!,” she said, “Then you should definitely go with the red peep-toe. That’ll turn him on.”

Thank you, whoever you are. My feet look really sexy.


About AshleyGee

I'm a graduate instructor at a completely Southern (Football, Rush Week, and lots of "Hey Y'alls!") university. I teach freshman comp, study
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